Wednesday, September 20, 2017

A Copy From Quora : Misunderstood

I cannot you enough thank you Mr Joel Griffin, Mr Chill Dude!
Ironically INPFs are the most misunderstood and most misrepresented of all of the types so just because people struggle to find anything positive about them doesn't necessarily mean there are only drawbacks. In fact, most INFP’s will read your list of drawbacks and say about 80–90% of them are not even drawbacks.
A big example: INFPs hate being criticized even when meant to be for positive growth. Here's the thing, people think this means they can't take criticism or deal with confrontation and that they're scared little 4 year olds running away from life, but it's quite the opposite actually. INFPs love to hear criticism. But something to keep in mind is they can see right through you; so when they sense your criticism is coming from a self-righteous and arrogant perspective and spoken as if a subjective opinion is a stone-cold absolutely objective fact, while also claiming it's meant to be taken positive when you're really just trying to get your ego boost for the day by putting someone down but in a way that allows you to sleep at night thinking you're a nice person, then an INFP is going to have a problem with your criticism. There are plenty of bad reasons people give criticism, and sadly more often than not, people criticize for a bad reason. I could actually make a very large list of awful reasons people criticize people while thinking they're being polite when in fact they are not. But I don't want to dwell on one little thing. So Anyways…
I’d make a list of a few people I would argue are absolutely the opposite of “the worst” that are INFP but that list would be endless as well. And that's just the real people. If we included fictional characters we'd have a list of nearly every superhero ever thought of. Heroes from movies that you and everybody else loves and easily relates to.
Now earlier, when I said misunderstood. What I mean is horrendously misunderstood. Like in most cases people are laughably misunderstood, but in an INFP’s case, they're sadly misunderstood. Like exponentially more misunderstood than the second-most misunderstood type.
Something else to keep in mind is comparing a healthy XYXY with an unhealthy XYXY. Comparing a healthy ESTJ to an unhealthy INFP is not fair for anybody and in most cases this is what people do. When someones view of a type is that of an unhealthy version of said type, then of course finding anything positive is completely impossible. And then comparing it to healthy versions of other types is really kind of messed up. Maybe INFPs have a long list of small drawbacks, but every other type has a short list of horrendous drawbacks. So take your pick. Hell, one of the supposed biggest drawbacks of being an INFP is the whole Rose-Colored-Glasses perspective where they only see the positive things in life and in people. Maybe we people could learn a thing or two from that and try using these glasses on the very creators of it for a change. Why can an INFP tell us everything positive about ourselves but then when they ask you to name one positive thing about them you can't think of even one thing? And then we have the balls to say that's a negative trait. Somebody grab the tissues because that's some sad, messed up poopoo we’re sitting in.
I could honestly write all day about how untrue most people's perception of an INFP is horrendously incorrect, but I'm really not in the mood haha
It really all comes down to people looking at INFPs from a superficial perspective. We only look at the rough waves of the ocean without ever taking the time to see the vast and deep sea life growing beneath those very waves. Maybe from our outside perspective it looks rough, but if you dove for even a second you would see it's infinitely more complicated down there than any of us could have cared to imagine. Most of our views of INFPs are thus; we analyze the surface, we think it looks rough and the story ends. What we don't know is that every negative characteristic we think they have is but a misconception based on assumptions. Just like earlier with the criticism. We forget they are deep people and so we think “oh they're just childish” when in reality if done properly and with a loving heart but not a judgemental one, INFPs receive criticism better than anybody. But we can't forget that they see through our folly and will know if you're criticizing for the right reasons. Remember, they have a strong sense and value of morals so when you overstep, what do they do? They pounce. Haha. If anyone's ever properly criticized an INFP you'd know this to be true. They will look up at you with such a strong passion ready to learn as you correct and critique them rather than the usual resentful one which is sadly more common because people hardly ever do this properly. If you ask an INFP how someone should critique someone, they will go on about love and heart and feelings and speak the most philosophical things your ears have ever heard. So when someone doesn't do this, and it's someone that they care about, then they get very confused. “Why do you hate me? You're supposed to love me. Why do you hurt me like this?” And then they go and question everything they know about you. “Why do I love them more than they love me?” You see, INFPs are deep little creatures, and it’d be wise for us not to forget this. Think up any negative trait, and then ask a few INFPs what they think. Most will say “oh I see why you think it's bad, but actually [insert a deep thought here]. I say most because honestly some INFPs have been dragged down so hard and told they're wrong so many times they may have actually started to listen. Sad day.
So are INFPs the unluckiest of the bunch? I'd say quite the opposite. Misunderstood? Absolutely. But being lucky is one of their greatest qualities.

Aku rasa macam nak nangis baca bila diingatkan semuanya betul. 

Syukur. Gratitude.

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